S.u.G.a.R;;

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-11-20T20:16:00

2006-11-21T03:16:49Z

She looks at herself in the mirror
never has been, She never will be.
Nothing good about her can she see.
Your living a lie, girl.
the pieces of your life begin to unfurl.
You sleep around for sympathy
It's all about the ecstasy
that feeling of joy that rushes down your spine,
the moment your fingers begin to intertwine
What happens when the feelings dry?
Drops fall down your cheek as you begin to cry
What can you do to ease the pain?
The bottle, too, will eventually drain.
Leavin nothing but thoughts running through your head
"If only, this bullet would strike me dead"
With a click and a boom,
she _falls to the ground.
Smile across her face, her breathing
S L O W L Y S T A R T S TO D R O W N

UPDATES

2006-11-21T03:03:36Z

I basically suck at life.
I pretty much have to drop out cause i missed too much days. i definately never wanted this, but thats what it comes down to in the long run. me sitting at home all the time, doing nothing. staying up to 4 Am, sleeping in till 3 pm. What a life. Lately, im such a loser it kills me to even look at myself in the mirror at times. What am i going to make of myself? a crappy 90 dollar paycheck a week, which over half ends up spent on some mind-altering substance. it's the only thing that makes me feel good. Once it hits you, you feel no pain. you feel like your on top of the world. Nothing can break you. Then it wears off, your at the lowest of the lows. and it leaves u wondering if you should just stay that way. False hopes. wasted tears. broken dreams. This is me in a nut shell.
My life has gone down the tubes. i notice it. my friends notice it. my family. I can't make it over a couple days sober, i lose my mind. I want to die, i get the point where i would do anything just to feel better. I fuck to feel no pain, then regret it the next day. Im the talk of the town. I got bitches after me for fuckn wit their boyfriends. people talkin mad shit. But you know what i do? I keep my head up. way in the clouds. i fake a smile. i pretend i'm alright. When deep down inside, i know im agreeing wit them all along. And there's nothing more then i would want, than to Stop this, all of this, for good.

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-10-13T10:28:00

2006-10-13T10:33:44Z

So i definately never write in this thing anymore..

nothing much has changed. at this point in time i work at roms a couple days a week.. lately i been to much of a bum to go to skool, missed like 3 weeks in a row now.. duno wut im guna do wit that.. dont wana drop out but eh. idk. other then that i been sitting on my fat ass doing nothing too exciting. partying it up on the weekends like always... went to get my permit but they give u a eye test n i cant see far away so i went n ordered some glasses... wen they cum bak im going for my permit again.. which wil be friggen 4-6 weeks ah. so gay. but w/e. i can`t drive anyway. lol. hmm.

idk ill update later i guess.

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-07-24T00:14:00

2006-07-24T04:15:00Z

i dont write in this shit ne more its prettyu gay if u ask me

all i gots to say is

I HATE THE ARMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! >:0!!!

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-30T13:34:00

2006-06-30T17:34:46Z

tonight should be fucking awesomeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
=D=]=]=]=]=]=]=]=D!!!!!!!!!

ill update later

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-23T12:58:00

2006-06-23T16:58:38Z

i have to go to summer school starting monday ahah how gay is that

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-21T10:07:00

2006-06-21T14:07:19Z

SCHOOL`S OVER!!
I don`t want it to be....

this summer is going to suck. everyone`s leaving me.. im gona sit in the house n twiddle my thumbs all day hahahah

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-18T23:28:00

2006-06-19T03:29:14Z

well tonight was freakin awesome.
Me n Schaniece hung out at freniers for a bit then she left n i stayed there

i had fun, ima leave it at that hahaha

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-18T11:09:00

2006-06-18T15:12:55Z

the woods party friday was interesting.. at first it was just me reid mayo tex mike n willy but then we ended up going up to another party. And being the only girl at a party is notthat fun lol. Some random kid offered me $40 to suck his friends dick lol it was out of control. I stayed sober most of the night though, that kinda sucked. Last night i went to carissas dads house and partied then later slept at becky`s house wit cody.. Bonin was there too. Interesting night... haha.

We have finals monday tuesday n wednesday.... Half days all week bitches. we get out wednesday. Thank god.

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-15T22:55:00

2006-06-16T02:58:42Z

Soo shaun came over again tonight..
Tomorrow im sposta be going to a woods party i guess n saturday i may be going to mae's uncles house wit her to drink... hopefully. it`s been fuckin forever since i hung out wit mae .. nevermind drink wit her lol

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-14T23:44:00

2006-06-15T03:47:00Z

Soo last night i went to Freniers and had an awesome time..

Tyler left today...=[ I won`t get to see him for like 2 months man idk wut im gona do wit myself lol =\ Well i also hung out with shaun today and realized how much i missed the kid... i had fun wit him and def feel like the biggest asshole for all shit i put him through..

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-10T02:13:00

2006-06-10T06:15:50Z

So tonight i went to the movies wit Jeff petey n tyler... We went n saw the omen.. the movie wasn`t all that great.. in fact.. it kind of sucked.... but. i had lots of fun with Jeff=] And i can`t wait till Tyler`s party tomorrow it is going to be fucking AWESOME.

=] =] =] ♥

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-07T17:54:00

2006-06-07T21:55:41Z

Yessssss
this weekend is gonna be awesome.. Friday night i guess i`m going to the movies with Jeff petey & tyler then after we're going to his house to chill. Saturday night is gonna be tyler's going away party=[ It's gonna be fucking AWESOME though.

I can't wait. =D

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-06-06T15:08:00

2006-06-06T19:08:45Z

I have a crush on someone! haha

SCORE!

2006-06-05T06:09:00Z

this weekend was fun. friday night i hung out with kaitlyn, petey, jeff mayo, jeff reid, tyler, and perry. Saturday i hung out with pretty much the same people it was awesome as fuck though. The whole time we were drinking/smoking/making out.. ohh yeah. lots of that. I had some fun With petey both those nights haha =]

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-05-31T14:10:00

2006-05-31T18:23:52Z

well my bday was on memorial day so i`m finally fucking 16!!! YYYEAHHHHH.
I had a party the day b4 my bday and got fucking wasted, kaitlyn ended up puking then standing up n she fell right in her puke hahah then we came in my rooom n she randomly pulls her pants down n squats over my trash can to piss in it lmao so i had to like caryy her downstairs pretty much.. then i randomly got wicked pissed and started crying cause my mom wouldnt bring kaitlyn home lmao [me+vodka=bad combination] so Veronica stayed up partying all night with my mom while i passed out hahah. nothing to exciting....

Last night i got FUCKED UP. i didn't even end up going to school cuz the room was still spinning when i woke up lol... i had like 12 beers, a perk, smoked a blunt + 2 bowls, did some yay... and man was i feeling nice by then end of the night hahaha

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-05-13T14:33:00

2006-05-13T18:34:09Z

I just finally got my internet back on.

Alot of shit has happened in the time that i've had it off that i'm not gonna write in here.

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-03-16T19:16:00

2006-03-17T00:16:22Z

I'm gona die of liver failure by the time i hit 21 haha

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-03-12T12:52:00

2006-03-12T17:54:20Z

Slept at tyler's sisters last night.

Quinn, jack, and Ben came over for a little too.
i drank almost a whole bottle of whiskey and didnt even get drunk, it sucked.

then me n tyler stayed up till 4 in the morning texting Quinn lol

So after 4 hours of sleep here i sit bored as shit...... fun.

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-03-11T14:53:00

2006-03-11T19:55:39Z

hahah last night was carissas boyfriends bday party so me and kait stopped up there..
there was a bunch of drunk people and we were like the only sober ones there hahah so we bought some Jack and started drinking.. then at like 10 me kait crystal josh and this other kid walked to jason's house and stayed there for about an hour then my mom called freaking out so we had to come back.. but it was still fun.

Tonight I guess im drinking with Tyler.
Thats all i ever do sheesh. lol

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-03-08T18:23:00

2006-03-08T23:24:44Z

why am i talking to this boy still?!
aye aye aye.

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-03-07T12:21:00

2006-03-07T17:24:00Z

I try not to let it affect, me but it does.
And i just can't help feeling like shit.

I haven't felt this horrible in a long time.

Someone help me?

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-03-06T13:40:00

2006-03-06T18:43:30Z

Izzy is such a STUPID PIECE OF SHIT

he broke up with me to get with the fat bitch he fucked the last time we broke up..

nice to kno im nothing more than a piece of ass to everyone.

IM SO PISSED I WANNA FUCKING MURDER HIM RIGHT NOW

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-03-05T20:09:00

2006-03-06T01:11:04Z

sean nvr came bak :(

kaitlyn ended up staying here all weekend.
we drink but not enough to get drunk.

aye aye aye

I miss Izzy.

And i need to get realy fucked up right about now.

fall_to_p1ecesx @ 2006-03-03T16:21:00

2006-03-03T21:22:57Z

Izzy broke up with me last night..
after blowing me off for a couple of weeks..
he goes on fucking myspace and goes "hey i think we should break up"
what a bitych. like he culdnt of just told mein the first place he didnt like me insted of leading me on.

err we.
Sean came over today :]

i guess were gona drink tomoro that shall be fun